how come nobody ever told me?

blue cheese stuffed green olives are delicious. how come nobody ever told me?

my scion weighs like 100 pounds and therefore acts like a lovely, slender figure skater on the roads this winter. how come nobody ever told me?

the old testament is really entertaining and i'm eating it up. how come nobody ever told me?

there is such a thing as a heated steering wheel. how come nobody ever told me?

an apple a day really does keep the doctor away. how come nobody ever told me?

speak up!

we have this application at work; the microsoft outlook voice mail transcription service. it is used to create an email preview to the voice mails you receive. 

here's one i got today: 

"connor christopher pre-23rd me. thank you bye."

who is connor christopher? and what does it mean to "pre-23rd" someone? 

sounds frightening.